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circling up or down?

Di dunia ini ada yang namanya resiprokal (reciprocal). Bahasa resmi yang lain adalah lingkaran setan. Kalau orang suka dengan orang lain, dan dibalas suka, maka bertambahlah suka keduanya. Demikian juga dengan benci. Kalau yang satu mulai benci, dibalas benci, maka bertambah kuatlah keduanya saling benci.

Ajaibnya, lingkaran seperti ini bisa diputus. Tentu butuh usaha, butuh energi. Besarnya tergantung kuatnya lingkaran itu.

Tambah ajaib lagi, lingkaran setan ini berlaku di banyak hal. Nggak cuma perasaan, tapi juga manajemen dan bisnis. Mungkin karena manusia itu nggak pernah bisa lepas dari aspek psikologis. Entah juga penyebabnya apa, bisa jadi topik penelitian temen-temen gua yang Phd :)

Tapi contoh praktisnya, banyak orang yang berbisnis dan jadi kaya raya dari modal kecil sekali. Bahkan mulai dari kuli, buruh bangunan, buruh industri. Mereka memutarkan apa yang 'lewat' di sisi mereka membentuk spiral yang membesar. Modal terus bertambah, skala terus meningkat. Permasalahan baru di tiap lingkaran dihadapi dengan bijak serta dipilih-pilih mana yang memang relevan di tingkatan sekarang, mana yang nanti saja diselesaikan. Jadinya... circling up and up and up.... yang sebetulnya jadi tak terbatas.

Spiraling down juga ada, misalnya begitu sang manajer tidak lagi melihat anak buahnya bisa bekerja dengan baik. Kemudian sang manajer terbawa capek atau malas untuk memberikan perhatian yang cukup. Baginya harusnya dengan teguran saja terus semuanya beres. Kalau sudah begini, anak buahnya pun jadi tambah malas bekerja. Tidak termotivasi dengan benar. Tahun depan, saat ada penilaian performance, si anak buah jadi makin nggak suka karena disodorkan ke mukanya penilaian yang jelek. Menurutnya, pak manajer yang nggak bisa kasih arahan yang jelas. Performance nya makin turun, bekerja makin asal-asalan. Pak manajer pun jadi makin kencang, makin pelit untuk menurunkan anggaran di bagian yang dinilai tidak produktif. Spiralling down. Tanpa batas juga.

Kalau sudah terjebak seperti ini, ya silakan memutuskan saja. Apa memang lebih baik keluar dari lingkaran ini dengan cara keluar dari situasinya? Atau ada salah satu pihak yang sebetulnya bisa memberikan usaha lebih, maju dari garis batas psikologisnya, memberikan usaha untuk memutar balik arah spiral yang sedang terjadi?

If you a good leader, you know which option comes first.

My plan is ...

My plan is no plan.

My plan is not that plan.

My plan is not yours.

haha... poor me.

recent quotes

Recent quotes at my office these days:

ODB= Ogah Denger Beatles

OBYD= Orang Baik Yang Dimanfaatkan.

Cambuk berduri.

dekatkan dengkulmu ke kepala supaya lebih cepat berpikir... soalnya ...

tanda tangan ini nilainya sepuluh persen dari gaji pertama eloe

Conscientious

Main Entry: con·sci·en·tious
Pronunciation: "kän(t)-shE-'en(t)-sh&s
Function: adjective
1 : governed by or conforming to the dictates of conscience : SCRUPULOUS <a conscientious public servant>
2 : METICULOUS, CAREFUL <a conscientious listener>
synonym see UPRIGHT
- con·sci·en·tious·ly adverb
- con·sci·en·tious·ness noun

Can't Stop Loving You

Hey!
There's a time and place for everything, for everyone
We can push with all our might, but nothin's gonna come
Oh no, nothin's gonna change
An' if I ask you not to try, oh could you let it be?

I wanna hold you and say
We can't throw this all away
Tell me you won't go, you won't go
You have to hear me say

I can't stop lovin' you
And no matter what I say or do
You know my heart is true, oh
I can't stop lovin' you

You can change your friends, your place in life
You can change your mind
We can change the things we say, and do any time
Oh no, but I think you'll find
That when you look inside your heart
Oh baby, I'll be there. Yeah!

Hold on. I'm holdin' on
Baby, just come on, come on, come on
I just wanna hear you say

I can't stop lovin' you
And no matter what you say or do
You know my heart is true, oh-oh!
I can't stop lovin' you

Oh, I'm so twisted and tied
And all I remember, was how hard we tried
Only to surrender

And when it's over
I know how it's gonna be
And true love will never die
Or, not fade away

And I can't stop lovin' you
And no matter what I say or do
You know my heart is true, oh
I can't stop lovin' you

And I know what I got to do
Hey Ray, what you said is true, oh
I can't stop lovin' you, oh no
Oh, I can't stop lovin' you

Markus 12

Pada suatu kali Yesus duduk menghadapi peti persembahan dan memperhatikan bagaimana orang banyak memasukkan uang ke dalam peti itu. Banyak orang kaya memberi jumlah yang besar.

Lalu datanglah seorang janda yang miskin dan ia memasukkan dua peser, yaitu satu duit.

Maka dipanggil-Nya murid-murid-Nya dan berkata kepada mereka: "Aku berkata kepadamu, sesungguhnya janda miskin ini memberi lebih banyak dari pada semua orang yang memasukkan uang ke dalam peti persembahan.

Sebab mereka semua memberi dari kelimpahannya, tetapi janda ini memberi dari kekurangannya, semua yang ada padanya, yaitu seluruh nafkahnya."

bajakan

Apa beli cd / dvd bajakan itu legal? Nggak juga sih...

Tapi apa membiarkan orang / negara miskin bersusah payah membeli cd / dvd yang mahal itu legal? Legal. Jadi, kapitalisme itu legal. Jadi, membiarkan diri kita bertambah kaya sementara orang lain tetap miskin itu legal. Membiarkan gap kaya-miskin terjadi dan makin melebar itu pun legal.

Fair enough? Maybe <<read this with cynical smile>>.

Daripada pusing dengan ethical questions seperti di atas... mendingan kita putuskan saja apa yang tepat buat kita. Tetap menonton dvd bajakan, tetap mendengar musik dari cd bajakan! Hehehe... Toh mereka itu sudah kaya, dan juga masih akan lebih kaya lagi daripada kita-kita. Juga mengaku dengan bangga bahwa kita ini miskin. Ucapkan pernyataan maaf sebanyak-banyaknya, bahwa kita ini fans mereka dan sayangnya belum bisa menjadi bagian dari segmen pasar "legal" mereka. Semoga mereka mau mengerti, bahwa lebih baik kita ini tetap jadi fans mereka (meskipun belum mampu bayar) daripada berhenti nonton film atau dengerin musik mereka.

Fair enough? Yup <<read this with devilish smile>>.

5 Stages of Group Development

Stage 1: Forming

In the Forming stage, personal relations are characterized by dependence. Group members rely on safe, patterned behavior and look to the group leader for guidance and direction. Group members have a desire for acceptance by the group and a need to be know that the group is safe. They set about gathering impressions and data about the similarities and differences among them and forming preferences for future subgrouping. Rules of behavior seem to be to keep things simple and to avoid controversy. Serious topics and feelings are avoided.

The major task functions also concern orientation. Members attempt to become oriented to the tasks as well as to one another. Discussion centers around defining the scope of the task, how to approach it, and similar concerns. To grow from this stage to the next, each member must relinquish the comfort of non-threatening topics and risk the possibility of conflict.

Stage 2: Storming

The next stage, which Tuckman calls Storming, is characterized by competition and conflict in the personal-relations dimension an organization in the task-functions dimension. As the group members attempt to organize for the task, conflict inevitably results in their personal relations. Individuals have to bend and mold their feelings, ideas, attitudes, and beliefs to suit the group organization. Because of "fear of exposure" or "fear of failure," there will be an increased desire for structural clarification and commitment. Although conflicts may or may not surface as group issues, they do exist. Questions will arise about who is going to be responsible for what, what the rules are, what the reward system is, and what criteria for evaluation are. These reflect conflicts over leadership, structure, power, and authority. There may be wide swings in members’ behavior based on emerging issues of competition and hostilities. Because of the discomfort generated during this stage, some members may remain completely silent while others attempt to dominate.

In order to progress to the next stage, group members must move from a "testing and proving" mentality to a problem-solving mentality. The most important trait in helping groups to move on to the next stage seems to be the ability to listen.

Stage 3: Norming

In Tuckman’s Norming stage, interpersonal relations are characterized by cohesion. Group members are engaged in active acknowledgment of all members’ contributions, community building and maintenance, and solving of group issues. Members are willing to change theirpreconceived ideas or opinions on the basis of facts presented by other members, and they actively ask questions of one another. Leadership is shared, and cliques dissolve. When members begin to know-and identify with-one another, the level of trust in their personal relations contributes to the development of group cohesion. It is during this stage of development (assuming the group gets this far) that people begin to experience a sense of group belonging and a feeling of relief as a result of resolving interpersonal conflicts.

The major task function of stage three is the data flow between group members: They share feelings and ideas, solicit and give feedback to one another, and explore actions related to the task. Creativity is high. If this stage of data flow and cohesion is attained by the group members, their interactions are characterized by openness and sharing of information on both a personal and task level. They feel good about being part of an effective group.

The major drawback of the norming stage is that members may begin to fear the inevitable future breakup of the group; they may resist change of any sort.

Stage 4: Performing

The Performing stage is not reached by all groups. If group members are able to evolve to stage four, their capacity, range, and depth of personal relations expand to true interdependence. In this stage, people can work independently, in subgroups, or as a total unit with equal facility. Their roles and authorities dynamically adjust to the changing needs of the group and individuals. Stage four is marked by interdependence in personal relations and problem solving in the realm of task functions. By now, the group should be most productive. Individual members have become self-assuring, and the need for group approval is past. Members are both highly task oriented and highly people oriented. There is unity: group identity is complete, group morale is high, and group loyalty is intense. The task function becomes genuine problem solving, leading toward optimal solutions and optimum group development. There is support for experimentation in solving problems and an emphasis on achievement. The overall goal is productivity through problem solving and work.

Stage 5: Adjourning

Tuckman’s final stage, Adjourning, involves the termination of task behaviors and disengagement from relationships. A planned conclusion usually includes recognition for participation and achievement and an opportunity for members to say personal goodbyes. Concluding a group can create some apprehension - in effect, a minor crisis. The termination of the group is a regressive movement from giving up control to giving up inclusion in the group. The most effective interventions in this stage are those that facilitate task termination and the disengagement process.

Adapted from:

Tuckman, B. (1965) Developmental Sequence in Small Groups. Psychological Bulletin, 63, 384-399.

Tuckman, B. & Jensen, M. (1977) Stages of Small Group Development. Group and Organizational Studies, 2, 419-427.

leadership qualities are dependent on context

The Admirable Crichton

The Admirable Crichton is a play by J M Barrie about how leadership qualities required to succeed can vary in different contexts.

It tells the story of an aristocratic family and their servants; leadership is provided by Lord Loam, because his qualities are ideally suited for English high society. Crichton, the butler, performs a subservient role. However, when the family and servants are shipwrecked and marooned on a desert island, the qualities required to lead them through their struggle for survival are very different: Crichton's qualities are more suited, so he assumes the leadership role.

Ultimately, when they are rescued, Crichton demonstrates great understanding of the importance of adapting to the context, and quickly relinquishes his leadership role.

Twelve O'Clock High

Twelve O'Clock High is a film starring Gregory Peck that illustrates how "unacceptable" behaviours can sometimes play an important role in leadership.

The film tells the story of a failing bomber group that is transformed by Brigadier Savage (Gregory Peck). One of the key actions he performed was to demote and humiliate Lieutenant Colonel Ben Gately, forcing him to write the words "leper colony" on his plane.

In many modern business contexts, such behaviour by Savage might be labelled unacceptable, being classified as psychological bullying or providing grounds for claiming constructive dismissal. In the context of the bomber group, however, Savage's action is usually taught as an example of great leadership.

Don Alan Pennebaker (1930-, American filmmaker)

After love, the most sacred gift you can give is your labor.

The Impossible Dream

To dream the impossible dream
To fight the unbeatable foe
To bear with unbearable sorrow
To run where the brave dare not go

To right the unrightable wrong
To love pure and chaste from afar
To try when your arms are too weary
To reach the unreachable star

This is my quest
To follow that star
No matter how hopeless
No matter how far

To fight for the right
Without question or pause
To be willing to march into Hell
For a heavenly cause

And I know if I'll only be true
To this glorious quest
That my heart will lie peaceful and calm
When I'm laid to my rest

And the world will be better for this
That one man, scorned and covered with scars
Still strove with his last ounce of courage
To reach the unreachable star

masih juga

Huah! Masih di situ ternyata.

{ a p a a n   s i h ? }

Be optimistic, take your calculated risk. Make changes along your path. Your friends will be supporting you. Believe me.

{ a p a   c o b a ? }

huaaaaaaa...

3d_render  Ngerender lagi euy!